The Avalanche
by addicted2Twifanfics
Summary: AH.Bella is the only daughter of a rich family. When she's left on her own, she choses to move. Even if it's temporary.She moves in hopes of being relieved of her pain. But moving is not the only thing that helps her. Enter E.
1. Chapter 1

_**Second story. First one is L2E, check it out if you are interested. This has been on my mind for a LONG time and I had to write it. Some part of this story is based on a book I have read a long time ago. "Ice Castle"(translated). **_

_**Summary: **_AH-1901.Bella is the only daughter of a prosperous family. She had lived resembling a royalty all her life. What will happen, when all she has known, had been destroyed. She is left on her own. How will she cope? She moves away. To where you'll find out.

_**Disclaimer: Twilight is for the one and only Stephenie Meyer. **_

**Prologue**

"Miss Isabella" was the only coherent word I could hear from the muffled whispers around the house.

I overlooked it and resumed my sleep. I was dreaming of the garden my dad was so fond of. He talked about it when I was just a little girl.

He told me the garden was enchanted. He promised that he would take me there someday, take me to the place he was born. England.

I have dreamed about this place many times.

Though this time, when I was passing through the garden I realized that it was filled with red roses. I wanted to pick one up and put it in my hair. I know I won't be able to do that because Jasper isn't there to pick the flower for me. He never let me pick one before because "my soft hands would get scratches all over them" as he would put it.

I tell myself that I can do this on my own; I don't need my older brother to aid me for a simple task as this one. I pick a rose and its thorns slice through one of my finger tips.

Reflexively I draw my hand back, and put my injured finger in my mouth. Reminding myself that my brother had been right, I should always let him pick a flower for me.

I hate the smell of blood it makes me queasy, even in my dreams. So I drop my hand and carry on to walk through the garden.

"Miss Isabella is severely ill Sir, I'm afraid you'll have to be patient." My nurse told someone, but it was loud enough to awaken me.

I grumbled they all knew better to wake me up in this state.

I had a serious illness and they were all aware of that. My parents have left them lucid instruction on how to take care of me; however, they were following them rather poorly. I without a doubt remember that the first thing my father told them was to never wake me up and let me rest, even if it's for the whole day.

I bid myself to inform my parents about their lack of performance.

"We need to talk to her at this instant" I didn't recognize the guest's voice, but I assumed by her he meant me since I was the lady of the mansion.

I was temporarily staying in one of the guest rooms downstairs; my father didn't think it was wise for me to sleep in my room which is farther away from both the maids and the nurse's room.

I put on a robe and walked out of the room. From how close their voices seemed to be I knew that the guest was standing at the door so I made my way to the front door of the mansion. My mother would distress if she saw me look this UN-lady like. I couldn't be bothered, I was annoyed. I just wanted to get this over with, whatever it was, and go back to sleep.

I wanted to dream of the garden again. Thinking about it made me miss my parents and brother less.

I reached the door. I saw our doorman blocking the guest's entrance. I guess they have already thrown him out. I twirled around, I would have run to my room, but my nurse's voice interrupted that idea.

"Miss Isabella you know you should be resting, what are you doing here?"

I huffed, and scolded myself in my head. A lady never huffs. I turned to her about to answer her pleasantly, when the stranger's voice came through the door.

"Miss Cullen I have news for you, please let me in."

"Open the door Michael." I ordered the door man.

He complied without any hesitation.

The stranger looked exhausted and frenzied. He wasn't a young man. I would call him middle age maybe.

"Umm…I h-have terrible n-news.." he stuttered.

I'm sure I had never looked more puzzled in my life than now. I didn't interrupt; merely because there wasn't any word I could find to respond to him.

"Y-your parents and brother…they were good people…and they're…" He didn't need to finish because I know what he meant.

They are gone. Forever.

**Love it? Hate it? Tell me what you think. **

**This won't be updated if not reviewed :) I'm sorry but I need encouragement. **


	2. Chapter 2

_**Disclaimer: Twilight is for the one and only Stephenie Meyer.**_

_**I'm sorry for any errors, I need a beta:(**_

**Chapter 1. With the first glance**

_Two months before the prologue._

My hair was sprawled all around me on the blanket and I was reading my favorite book Wuthering Heights. I inhaled a deep breath through my nose just for the sake of smelling all the flowers around me.

My parents had worked really hard on this garden because my dad wanted us to have something similar to what he had during his childhood, his magical garden.

"Isabella." I heard my most favorite person in the world calling me.

I knew I didn't have to answer him. He'd know where to find me so I laid the book across my stomach and feigned sleep.

I heard his footsteps getting closer to me.

"I know you're faking sleep baby girl" He said trying to provoke me with the nicknames, he knew I resented them.

I opened one of my eyes just in time to see him pouring water on my hair.

"JASPER" I shrieked. He just turned and started to run away.

I jumped up from my place and sprint after him. He was running toward the house and he knew I couldn't follow him while running. Although I slowed down my pace to walking I was still panting.

My hair was drenched thanks to him now I had to do it all over again.

"Oh my sweet Jesus, what happened to your hair dear?" My mother asked.

"Your son thought it was funny to pour water on my hair." I was on the verge of crying and my mother, Esme knew this so well.

"Don't worry Isabella we'll get the hair dresser to fix your hair again."

I placed a kiss on her chick as a thank you and turned to make my way to my room.

"Don't I deserve a kiss Izzy?" Jasper asked from behind me.

I formed a plan in my head instantly.

"Of course you do big brother." I said sweetly hoping that he doesn't see through my plan.

I leaned in to place a kiss on his chick also, but instead I pinched his chick.

"OUCH, ISABELLA? WHAT THE-"Jasper started but my mother and I interrupted him at the same time.

"Jasper, language dear." My mom scolded him, with furrowed eyebrows.

"That's for calling me childish names." I retorted.

"That was not nice Isabella-"This time she was interrupted by my father.

"-Es, dear I suppose Jasper deserved it, let the girl defend herself. I mean look what he did to her hair." He chuckled while pointing to my head.

"I think you should go fix your hair Isabella, we should leave soon." He continued.

I nodded my head toward him and walked upstairs to my room with my mother following close behind me.

"I think you should change your gown too Isabella, you were laying on the blanket and it's all wrinkled."

"It is not-"I was saying, but stopped when I saw myself in the mirror.

"You're right." I told my mother.

I walked out of my walk-in closet when I finished changing my gown.

My mother and the hair dresser where waiting for me.

"Hurry up dear we barely have time to get you all set." I stared at my mother she looked beautiful. She had done her make up when I was changing.

"You look beautiful mother." I smiled at her.

"Thanks dear, but take a sit we have exactly 20 minute to get you ready." She was fidgeting.

"I assure you Mrs. Cullen we'll get her ready on time." The hair dresser said. I didn't know her name since she was new.

With that they started working their magic on me. I didn't mind this. I hated the next part. I groaned internally fully aware that what kind of talk was approaching.

"Isabella, you look beautiful." My mother told me when they were done.

I blushed, of course.

"Oh dear with that blush you're going to win everyone's heart tonight." This wasn't her first time hinting that I was old enough to be wedded.

They weren't forcing me into anything. It wasn't like that. They just wanted me to have someone, but I had them and that was enough for me. Plus, I wasn't in need of someone taking care of me. I had Jasper, and my parents.

"Don't give me that look Isabella." She chided.

I smiled at her. "I want to find love like yours and father's, mother." _But I don't think it's a possibility_. I added in my head.

"Don't ask me to retell the story again dear, we don't have time." She knew me too well.

I laughed. We made our way down the flight of stairs. We had our coats around us just in case it got chilly.

Jasper and father were waiting for us at the bottom of stairs.

My mother wrapped her hand around my father's waiting arm. I did the same with Jasper.

"You look stunning, Bella."Jasper said.

"Thank you, Jazz-y." I giggled at him.

He feigned anger, but I knew he was fighting a smile.

"So tell me where we're all going again? What's the ceremony for _this time_?" Emphasizing on "this time" since we were invited to parties and ceremonies a few times every week.

My father, Carlisle, was a rich Englishman. He was a famous doctor so we were a well known family in Chicago.

"Jasper it's an engagement party. Angela's getting married." I said. I was happy for my friend.

"Angela Webber?" He said.

"Jasper, how many Angela-s do you know."

"Technically-"he started, but I cut him off.

"Hush, I'm aware that you don't know any other Angela." I said as we reached our carriage.

Jasper helped me in. We sat across our parents. The ride was filled with comforting silence.

"Do you think we'll ever find this" I whispered to Jasper while I pointed to my parents.

My mother had placed her head on father's shoulder both of their eyes closed.

"I don't know Isa, but we have each other at least right?"

"Isa really? Jasper can you at least settle for one of them? And you're right, I'll always have you."

When we reached to the Webber's mansion their door man opened the door. The hall was so elegant. It was filled with luxurious people. We parted from our parents to join our group of friends.

Most of the young ladies were fawning over Jasper, I wouldn't blame them he was handsome.

"Save me and I promise I'll save you from them." I told Jasper. He knew by _them _I meant Lauran and Jessica. Both didn't have any manners and tried to throw themselves at Jasper every chance they got.

He just nodded.

"Isabella." Angela summoned us closer. She was my closest friend. We made our way toward her.

"Angela congratulation, I'm so happy for you." I untangled my hand form Jasper and hugged my friend.

"Congratulation Angela" Japer said politely, while smiling. He looked at me then, "I'll let you ladies talk."

I nodded at him.

"So how did he propose?" There were rumors around our circle of friends that they were courted already, but I just took them as what they were, rumors.

"Oh Isabella, it was so romantic." Then she told me that he had taken her to the lake and proposed there.

"Who would have thought Ben and I would end-up together right?"

"You guys belong to each other."

"Well, well, well, look who is here." I know it was Peter, without looking. He used to be a good friend of Jasper up until he started showing interest in me. That's when Jasper stopped befriending him.

"I apologize for inviting him, but we had to invite his family" Angela whispered to me. Then she turned to Peter and said, "Excuse us Mr. Steven, I was about to introduce Isabella to my cousin."

Angela took my hand and dragged me toward her cousin I presume.

I saw Jasper talking to a young girl I didn't recognize. She was short with black hair. Her hair was short something unusual for a lady.

He caught my eyes, and looked at my way and smiled. I was waiting for him to give me the sign. He would always wink if he was in need of getting out of a situation; however, this time he didn't.

He returned his gaze to the girl standing next to him. He had a gleam in his eyes I had never seen before.

"Who's the girl Jasper is talking too?" I asked Angela. I don't know why I felt jealous.

"Oh she's my cousin, Alice. She's lovely. She came all the way here from Alaska."

"I'm positive she is, come on I want to meet her." I answer Angela. I hope she doesn't notice that all I want to do is to protect my brother from harm, _or keep him all to myself._

Alice is everything Angela described her to be. She's lovely, smart. Her hair is awfully short, and that makes her stand out between all the girls. She's different and new. That's why Jasper is attracted to her.

I know it's more than attraction, I can see it in both of them. I don't understand it though. They revolve around each other all night and I observe them closely.

At some point they both return their gaze to me. I'm sure Jasper is wondering why I'm glaring at Alice without actually knowing her, this is so unlike me. It's not just me who's acting differently though. It's him. He's so absorbed in Alice that he forgets to save me from the gentlemen who pursue me.

"Looks like Jasper finally found his match."Peter says. He's been trying to make friendly conversations with me all night.

I just nod at him. Let him know that I have actually heard what he said.

"This must be difficult for you." I glance at him. Surprised. Wondering what would make him say that.

"You two are always together, I've never seen you apart."

"He's just enjoying his evening, I'm positive everything would go back to normal tomorrow." Looking around hoping Jasper would just come and save me from Peter. I really didn't want to speak to him.

"You really think so? Doesn't look like that to me though. This _change_-", pointing his hand to Alice "-seems permanent to me."

Tears form in my eyes because I can see he's telling me the truth. Alice just stole not only my brother but also my best friend from me.

The month following Angela's engagement ceremony was horrible. I rarely saw Jasper. He spent all his days with Alice while I spent them reading.

I felt lonely because my two friends were occupied. Angela was busy with her wedding plans and Jasper was, well occupied with Alice.

I knew Jasper hasn't forgotten about me. He has tried to make me go out with them several times, but I just couldn't be their third wheel.

He even invited Alice for family supper one night. My parents knew something was going on with those two. I have tried to inform them that Jasper's relationship with Alice is not proper, but my parents said that they fully trusted Jasper and that he would tell us if things got serious with them.

I tried to throw a fit that I hated Alice, even that didn't work. My father told me to go to my room for the first time.

I was sitting in my parents' garden. My mood was foul because soon it would be impossible to spend any time in this garden. Winter was close.

The flowers were wilting. I rose from my blanket. I wanted to pick a flower.

"Isabella." I let out a startled gasp and close my eyes because I know that tone. He's scolding me for picking flowers.

"You know pretty girls should never pick flowers." He's frowning and walking close to me.

"Oh, and you should know better than startling _pretty girls_ Jasper." I answer him with a smile. Just to let him know that I'm teasing.

"You know you shouldn't be doing this. You're soft hands will get scratches all over them."

"You're not going to be here every time I want to pick a flower Jasper." Referring to the fact that I had barely seen him during these past few weeks.

"I'll always be there for you, Bella." I know that I had hurt him. It's evident in his voice.

"What about Alice?"

"What _about _Alice? What are you talking about?" He's utterly confused.

"You can't always be there for me, if you are spending all your day with Alice. You know what I don't understand. Why you enjoy spending time with her. She looks dull and her hair looks all strange. She's not even from Chicago..."I trail off. I know I'm just looking for excuses to get Jasper away from Alice. I know Alice is perfect. Maybe not _perfect_, but she's perfect for Jasper.

Jasper is irate and he has the right to be. I had just insulted him and Alice.

"Alice is not dull and you would know that if you gave her a chance, Isabella." I know I'm in serious trouble because he doesn't use any nicknames.

I'm quit for a whole minute; I don't know what to tell him. I could make this worse by just saying how Alice is a thief and she has stolen him from me. _You can't keep him forever Isabella._

"I love her." He simply states.

I gawk at him. We both know how serious that word is for us. We both want to find love like our parents'. Eternal love.

He nods his head toward the window and I know what he wants to say. He wants me to see that the love him and Alice share is like my parents' love. My parents are sitting next to each other, father is reading to my mother. She's looking at him with gleams in her eyes.

"Are you moving away?" Of all the question I could have asked him. I ask him the one that terrifies me the most.

"Why would I?" Jasper answers me confused yet again. He could be slow sometimes.

"You love Alice, and Alice lives somewhere is Alaska, so you move away to be with her, right?"

"Oh right! Well I haven't told Alice that I love her yet." He's looking at the ground sheepishly.

"I was looking for you for help actually, how do I tell her that I love her?"

"I don't know Jasper; I haven't had an actual conversation with Alice." It's my turn to look sheepish.

"You can invite her for dinner, tomorrow night, and tell her here." I suggested. Even though it was almost winter, the garden still looked beautiful.

"That's actually a nice idea, but will you be civil to Alice? You hurt her feelings last time. You need to grow-up a bit Isa." Clearly remembering how I have "accidently" poured a class of wine on Alice's dress the last time she was here. What she asked for it. She was making goo-ey eyes at my brother.

I rolled my eyes. "Fine. Just go invite her now before I change my mind."

"Do you think she loves me?" He says with worried eyes.

"I'm positive she does." She looked in love when I first met her.

"Thanks Izzy." He ruffled my hair just to get a rise out of me.

"Stop the nicknames Jasper. I swear I ask Alice to call you Jazz-y if you don't stop."

Alice did actually called Jasper Jazz-y all the time. I asked her to call him that, the night Jasper told her he loved her. They say "I love you" s every five minutes. I know it's too much, but they're adorable.

I realized that it was impossible not to like Alice. She became my best friend soon after I started to be civil toward her.

I was sitting next to the fireplace, reading a book that Alice had given me.

My parents were sitting close to me. Chatting freely.

Jasper had taken Alice to the Webber's mansion. He didn't like the idea of her riding alone at night.

When Jasper arrived he seemed distressed, I wanted to ask him what was bothering him, but he gave me a look that said later.

"Can I talk to you?" He was looking at my parents. "-In private. I'm sorry Isa, but I need to talk to them alone." He added.

I smiled at him letting him know that I'm not upset.

I took my book, and headed for my room.

I was there for about an hour, when I heard a knock on my door.

"Come in Jasper."

"How did you know it was me?" He asks after he lets himself in.

"I know how you knock. It's different from everyone else's."

He gives me a wink while he's grinning from ear to ear.

"Alice is leaving soon." My heart breaks for him. I'm waiting for him to show depression but I don't see any.

"Aren't you sad?" I'm ready to cause him serious pain because he told her he loved her and he's acting all normal now that she's leaving.

"No-"I'm fuming right now. "Whoa Izz, let me finish."

I'm still mad at him.

He changes the subject then, "Want to play in the snow? You need to calm down so I can talk to you." I'm not opposed to the idea of cooling down so I tell him to go get ready. I don't wear heavy clothes because we'll be back inside soon.

"Ready Izz?" He takes my hand. We run to the garden. It's covered with a thin white blanket of snow.

"There's not much to play with." I whine because I wanted to make a snowman.

"We can make snow angels." With that he drops to the ground and starts making a snow angel.

I giggle and mirror his position. By the time we finish playing in snow, I'm freezing, but I don't tell him this, because he would make me go inside and I truly don't want to.

"Isabella, I got you something." He gives me a necklace. It's beautiful. It has a single red rose charm. I know why he's giving this to me. He wants me to remember our talk the other day. He will always be there for me, and this necklace is a promise representing that. I place a peck on his Cheek so he knows that I love it.

"What happens when Alice leaves?" I ask him because I know he wouldn't be this joyful if it weren't for Alice.

"We leave with her."He answers me.

I stare at him dumbfounded.

"And by 'we', I mean all of us, Bella. You're coming with us." He's looking at me expectedly, but I'm still unresponsive.

"Oh think of it as a vacation-"

"So we're coming back? I thought we were all moving _there_." I interrupt him while emphasizing my dislike to Alaska.

"Yeah Belle we're just going there, so I can ask for Alice's hand for marriage from her parents." He says nonchalantly while shrugging.

"You're getting married." I shriek and start jumping; the coldness of the weather not preventing me from being blissful.

"I'm so happy for you." And I really am.

**Do you like it? Isabella is kind of spoiled in this story, but she will learn to grow-up, unfortunately the hard way:(**

**Review….if you like the story…or hate the story…just review…**


	3. Chapter 3

**I don't own Twilight. Or the name The Avalanche. It's apparently the name of ****an electronic music group from Melbourne, Australia.**- GOOGLE ILY

**A huge thank you to born2bmyself, who r&r'd every chapter.**

**AND sorry for the change of name. I find The Avalanche more fitting.  
**

**Long AN after this:D  
**

"Please Momma…" I pleaded in vain.

Three sets of determined eyes were looking back at me. I could see all of their emotions; they were making a serious effort not to give in to my pleadings.

"Isabella we're doing this for your own good." My father said he was fully in his doctor mode.

"Sweetheart, Juneau is extremely freezing. It's for the best if you stay behind."

I despised that my mother was right. I wouldn't be able to go with them even if they let me. I was ill. Thanks to the snow angels we made the other night.

I looked at my brother. He looked guilty while he shouldn't. I didn't wear suitable clothes for winter. It was my fault.

Alice was standing next to him. They weren't touching but they were close. She looked sad. She wanted me to see her home town.

I smiled at her.

"It's okay Bella-" She didn't call me Isabella. She thought Bella was more fitting for me. I tried to tell her that it's not, but Alice has her own way of getting what she wants. "-We'll be back before you know it."

"I just wanted to see the place you grew-up Alice" I said grouchily.

"Bella, we moved there five years ago. I was fourteen. I grew up here. And believe me it's awfully dull over there."

"I never understood why you-" I started sneezing and I couldn't stop it. I was going to tell Alice that I would never know why they left in the first place. Her home town seemed dreary even she was admitting it.

"You better stop Izz. Shouldn't we let her rest?" Jasper asked my dad.

Father nodded to Jasper then leaned in to kiss my head.

"We all love you Bella; we just want you to get better." He whispered. He stood up and wrapped his arms around my mother. She looked worried, and I knew my dad would lean in and whisper soothing words in her ear. He did exactly like what I thought. My mother didn't look fully unconcerned but she looked better, reassured maybe. According to my father, people died from flu every day and I wasn't going to be one of them.

They all took turn to kiss my head and left my room.

I thought about living without them for a few days and I started trembling. _They would be back soon._

With that thought I calmed myself down and let the slumber take over me.

For the next few days everyone at our manor was busy, they were making arrangements for their short journey, at least I'm hoping it's short. I spent most of my time in my room sleeping or reading in the library.

Alice's parents weren't rich by any means, a fact that had taken me by surprise. I always imagined Jasper's wife like someone at our level, but Jasper loved Alice and I respected that.

Her parents have approved of their marriage. Both my parents and Jasper had contacted them with letters and I know Alice wrote to them frequently.

Their only request was to meet our family.

"Izz reading again, really?" I looked up. Jasper was leaning in to get a glimpse of my book.

I hid the book behind me quickly. I was just being playful; I missed joking around with him. They were treating me like a doll that might break at any second.

"You know what; I don't need to see the book to know exactly what you're reading. Let me guess-" He pretended to ponder for a second "-Wuthering Heights, _again_."

"What's it t-" I couldn't complete my sentence because of coughing.

"Oh Bella, I'll never forgive myself for taking you out that night." He looked so sad, and it was breaking my heart I knew I had to fix this once and for all.

"Jazz-y-" I waited for his reaction to the nickname. There it was his bright smile. "It wasn't you're fault. I was feeling cold and I didn't tell you anything. Don't blame yourself. Maybe this way is better. You don't have me around you all the time you can concentrate on having a good time with Alice." I still hated that my time with him was divided between Alice and I now.

"No, it's never good when my dearest sister is away from me." He frowned.

"I know, but I will be alright. I have the whole house to myself. I can sleep and read all the time."

"You do realize that that's all you do now, right?"

I wasn't offended because it was true.

My social life was really limited because of the cold weather.

"Well, when you're gone, I won't have anyone to argue with all the time."

"You mean you won't argue with the servants and the nurse?"

He knew me to well.

"I will do my best."

"I love you Izz."

"Love you too Jazz-y." I giggled and he rolled his eyes.

I would miss him terribly.

The next morning I was awaken with the sound of chaos around the house. Today was the day.

I looked out my window. It was snowing. Not a good weather for travelling. I pondered on informing them about this, but I knew they had to leave. The sooner they leave the sooner they all will be back.

I was in sour mood already.

I dragged myself to my dresser and changed my clothes. When I was done, I looked around my room saying goodbye knowing that I would be staying in another room downstairs during my family's absence.

"You're awake. Good." Alice said chirpily. That girl was a ball of liveliness. She was putting her final touches on the decorations.

They have made their journey in a way that they would return prior to thanksgiving and Alice was given full permission to make the house decorated. She wanted to decorate the house for _thanksgiving_, something we have never done before. Everyone agreed because we were starting new. We had a additional member to our family, Alice. She was already like a sister to me. I was happy because now I had four people always there for me.

"Good morning Alice." I smiled at her.

"Good morning Bella. They're all in the dining room, having breakfast. Go join them. I'll be there in a few more minutes." She turned around to face the man behind him. I recognized him as the doorman.

"No Micheal, fold the napkin t-"

I laughed at the sight of the doorman trying to fold a napkin, Alice had everyone wrapped around her pinkie.

When I reached the dining room I stopped because I heard hushed voices.

"I just worry she can't be on her own." I recognized my mother's voice.

"She can be on her own momma, just give her a chance." I loved Jasper for this reason. He always had my back.

I cleared my throat and walked to sit next to Jasper.

"Good morning."

A chorus of "Good Morning Isabella" s filled the room.

"Did you see the staircase?" Mother asked.

"Of course it looks beautiful."

"Bella they're worried about you." Jasper said, breaking the ice.

"Jasper." My parents said at the same time in a scolding tone.

"What? I'm telling her the truth."

"I'm going to be fine." I was still sick, but I would be alright.

"Are you feeling better?" My dad asked.

"If I say yes would I be able to go with you?"

"You know the answer to that Isabella." He said it with a serious tone.

I rolled my eyes.

"And we don't have a train ticket for you." He continued.

"I'm positive you'll be able to get me a ticket. You're Carlisle Cullen, you can do anything."

"Flattery will get you nowhere Isabella." He was smiling, so I knew everything was good.

After breakfast they all went to their respective rooms to get ready.

I stayed in the living room. I couldn't bring myself to see their belongings being carried into a carriage and away from home.

"We'll be back before you know it Izz."

I was sniffing into a handkerchief.

He kneeled in front of me. "Don't cry Izz."

"Oh I'm crying because you won't call me by my name." I said coarsely, trying to lighten the mood.

"Why would I? You know my nicknames suit you better." I was happy that he didn't hover on the subject.

He hugged me and reassured me that everything will be alright. He touched my necklace and told me he would always be there for me. I needed the reassurance.

Why Alice's parents didn't live in Chicago I would never know.

My mother sobbed when she was saying goodbye to me. We have never been apart, and this was a first.

My father was composing himself. He just whispered a "We love you" in my ear.

I was weeping the whole time.

Alice was bouncing, nothing strange for Alice. She looked grim. I knew I wasn't the only one who had gained a sister.

"I'll see you soon sis." She placed a kiss on my cheek.

Saying goodbye to Jasper brought a whole new set of sobs.

"Take care Bella." He gave me a crushing hug.

When they left I went to my new room, and cried.

I already missed them.

Days passed. I spent most of the days sitting by the fire in the living room reading. Angela visited me a few times. She brought her fiancé with her too. They were good people, but I still missed my family.

I don't remember how the days passed.

Jasper sent me a letter once. Just telling me they have arrived and that Juneau was frosty.

I didn't return back his letter because they would be here in a couple of days. Thanksgiving was just a few days ahead.

"Miss Isabella" was the only coherent word I could hear from the muffled whispers around the house.

I overlooked it and resumed my sleep. I was dreaming of the garden my dad was so fond of. He talked about it when I was just a little girl.

He told me the garden was enchanted. He promised that he would take me there someday, take me to the place he was born. England.

I have dreamed about this place many times.

Though this time, when I was passing through the garden I realized that it was filled with red roses. I wanted to pick one up and put it in my hair. I know I won't be able to do that because Jasper isn't there to pick the flower for me. He never let me pick one before because "my soft hands would get scratches all over them" as he would put it.

I tell myself that I can do this on my own; I don't need my older brother to aid me for a simple task as this one. I pick a rose and its thorns slice through one of my finger tips.

Reflexively I draw my hand back, and put my injured finger in my mouth. Reminding myself that my brother had been right, I should always let him pick a flower for me.

I hate the smell of blood it makes me queasy, even in my dreams. So I drop my hand and carry on to walk through the garden.

"Miss Isabella is severely ill Sir, I'm afraid you'll have to be patient." My nurse told someone, but it was loud enough to awaken me.

I grumbled they all knew better to wake me up in this state.

I had a serious illness and they were all aware of that. My parents have left them lucid instruction on how to take care of me; however, they were following them rather poorly. I without a doubt remember that the first thing my father told them was to never wake me up and let me rest, even if it's for the whole day.

I bid myself to inform my parents about their lack of performance.

"We need to talk to her at this instant" I didn't recognize the guest's voice, but I assumed by her he meant me since I was the lady of the mansion.

From how close their voices seemed to be I knew that the guest was standing at the door so I made my way to the front door of the mansion. My mother would distress if she saw me look this un-lady like. I couldn't be bothered, I was annoyed. I just wanted to get this over with, whatever it was, and go back to sleep.

I wanted to dream of the garden again. Thinking about it made me miss my parents and brother less.

_They'll be here soon. _

I reached the door. I saw our doorman blocking the guest's entrance. I guess they have already thrown him out. I twirled around, I would have run to my room, but my nurse's voice interrupted that idea.

"Miss Isabella you know you should be resting, what are you doing here?"

I huffed, and scolded myself in my head. A lady never huffs. I turned to her about to answer her pleasantly, when the stranger's voice came through the door.

"Miss Cullen I have news for you, please let me in."

"Open the door Michael." I ordered the door man. I wanted to get this over with, whatever "this" might be.

He complied without any hesitation.

The stranger looked exhausted and frenzied. He wasn't a young man. I would call him middle aged maybe.

"Umm…I h-have terrible n-news.." he stuttered.

I looked at him expectedly.

"Y-your parents and brother…Miss Brandon…they were good people…and they're…" He didn't need to finish because I know what he meant.

My family was gone.

I tried to listen more; however, darkness was taking over.

The man said something about an "Avalanche" then I fainted.

The next few days were hazy. Angela stayed with me. She was kind but I couldn't thank her. I couldn't talk. I wanted this to be a nightmare. I wanted to wake up and see my family around me. I wanted to blame someone. I wanted to hate them because they promised they'll be back soon. Most of all I wanted to be on that train with them.

My family had passed away on 22nd of November. Six days before thanksgiving.

The officers informed me that there was a search for the bodies of the victims of the avalanche, but so far no one from my family had been found.

I asked if it was possible for someone to survive. They said yes, but the chances were slim.

I had hope. They wouldn't leave me.

Angela tried to tell me that I was in the state on denial, but I couldn't listen to her. I knew they would be back.

Life is cruel.

For six days I didn't cry. I didn't mourn. I kept chanting in my head that they will be back.

On thanksgiving I broke. I ruined Alice's decorations.

They were mocking me. Reminding me that I should have been happy right now. I should have been celebrating the addition to our small family. But instead I was mourning the loss of them. It hit me on thanksgiving.

That I would never hear Jasper calling me nicknames.

I would never see Alice bounce around the house.

I would never see my parents sitting around the fire.

I was crying. The fire was diminishing but I couldn't bring myself to add more logs to it.

My parents were buried under snow, I shouldn't feel warm.

I have dismissed everyone in the house. I didn't talk to them. I just wrote a letter for Angela. She fired everyone. Then I told her to leave to. She was reluctance to leave, but Ben forced her to go for the night.

The house was dead. Just like my family, just like I should have been too.

The silence was deafening until I heard a carriage pass through the gate. I went to open the door.

It was the same officer who told me my parents have passed away.

I hated the sight of him. I know I was being absurd, but he was bad news.

"Miss Cullen." He said in greetings.

I nodded my head at him, I couldn't talk to him. I have forgotten all of my manners apparently.

"Your father's-" and just for a second I let relief wash over my body. My father was found.

"Are you listening Miss?"

I shook my head, showing him that I was in fact listening.

"You're father's body has been found, he'll be here tomorrow. We wanted to inform you in case you wanted to hold a funeral for him." He paused for a second, "They haven't found any one else."

I didn't know what to feel. I was numb. Denial was getting me nowhere. My family has passed away.

And daddy's lifeless body was the only thing that was returning home.

**I think I should hide now.*ducks behind a table***

**So to answer everyone's questions about Edward. He will be coming to the story, in the next chapter or the one after that. If you read the summary, you can figure out where exactly the story is heading. I hope no one thinks that Bella's illness is out of blue. I tried to put hints in the last chapter. I said that she was cold and stuff like that.**

**Bella and Jasper are really close. I hope I portrayed their relation as such.**

**If you are bored and want to read a good E/B story read**

http:/www(.)fanfiction(.)net/s/5996819/1/If_You_Only_Knew (you know the drill, remove the brackets)

**Please take a minute(it would take less than a minute, promise) to review, because without reviews I won't know if I should continue or not:-S**


	4. Chapter 4

**Bet you thought I wouldn't continue this huh? So, umm thanks to my sister for being persistent, even from the other side of the world.**

**This chapter is incomplete, unedited, and not even pre-read, but I think it's not so bad. Forgive me for the mistakes.**

**SM OWNS.**

**sorry for the first line, I couldn't find a better word for it.**

**Chapter 5**

Life gets shitty. You have a family. Your brother is getting married. You are happy. You have a life. You live rather than just existing.

Then your bubble bursts. And you had no idea that you were living in a bubble and that that bubble, the one you were living in, could just burst at any minute. You're life changes. Completely.

You take everything for granted, your brother, your parents, even your soon to be sister in law. Then in just spare of a moment you lose all of them. Everything you had. Everything you lived for. All together.

That's when life gets shitty. You hate yourself because you should have been with them. You should have been gone as well.

When grandma Marie died, my mother told me that I shouldn't take a person for granted, you never know when they would just stop _being_.

And you know what I forgot that. I forgot that you can lose someone. I forgot the pain. All I could think about was why God would remind me of that pain. I would never forget it now. The weight of their loss hangs over my head every second of every day.

It's like a hole has been punched through my chest.

The wait for my father's body was almost as painful as his death. Almost.

But when the day arrived, I wished that it hadn't. Because seeing his coffin would make this nightmare a reality. If I hadn't lost it until now I would lose it when I see his coffin.

I can't do this.

People were moving around the house. It's not home anymore. It's just a house. Not my house.

Flowers. Ribbons. Candles. Photos. Portraits. But I can barely see any of them since my eyes are filled with tears.

I was supposed to be celebrating. I stopped myself from thinking about that.

For the thousand time I wished this wouldn't happen. I wished I was with them as well. I wished that I could go numb, but I couldn't.

"Isabella," Isabella not _Bella, Izzy, Izz, Bells_. I'm just Isabella now.

"You should put your outfit on. The funeral will begin in less than an hour." It was Angela; I didn't have to recognize her voice, because she was the only person who talked to me these days.

I went to my room, wore a dress that I hadn't even picked, Angela had picked it for me yesterday, when she found out I didn't have any appropriate dress to wear. Who owns an appropriate dress for her father's funeral?

I looked at myself in the mirror, seeing another person, this wasn't me. This girl didn't even look like me. She looked broken.

I tried to give myself a pep talk, I failed miserably. So I just shook my head at myself and descended down the stairs.

People talked to me. They said their condolences, many tried to sympathy me by saying their own stories, their own pain but frankly sympathy is futile in this case, so I just nodded while I wiped away my tears with my mother's handkerchief.

As the time grew closer, I grew more anxious. I was trembling.

They, fathers, all promise their little girls that they would never die. I'm not brainless I know they all break their promises, but still _he_ promised.

"It's time." The pastor said. And I began fidgeting, playing with my handkerchief. Everyone in the room turned to look at me. They all had the same look on their faces. Pity.

I decided that we would bury my father in our yard. It wasn't unusual. I knew this was what my father wanted.

I made my way through the garden. It was cold. Snowing. There wasn't any other place I could imagine for holding this service.

I took my seat. In the front row. Alone.

I imagined what Jasper and Alice's wedding would have been like. The snow would have made it beautiful.

It was funny how the same thing that would have made my brother's wedding beautiful is making my dad's funeral dreary.

"Would you like to say a few words?" The pastor asked me. I hadn't even heard a word before that.

"Umm…" Daughter of Mr. Cullen speechless, that's a first.

"It's okay, you can do this." Angela whispered from the row behind me.

The truth was that I hadn't even prepared a eulogy.

I stood up. Squaring my shoulders, I cleared my throat and started.

"My father, Carlisle, was brave. He did what he wanted in life. I believe he lived a happy life. He believed in destiny and fate." I croaked. Remembering all the time he told me, how he and my mom were meant to be. I almost smiled at the thought of their love. "This was his only explanation for the reason he moved to America, having left his life in England." I knew I was giving the worst eulogy ever, but this was the best I could do.

"He was the best father that anyone could wish for." I was gazing at his coffin. I stepped closer and laid my hand on it.

"I love you Daddy."

MM

I didn't watch when they buried my father; I went to the back with Angela at my heels and collapsed in her arms when we passed the last row. I just sobbed.

When I calmed down enough to move indoors I heard Peter calling me.

"Isabella." I tensed at the sound of his voice.

"Mr. Stevens" I acknowledged him.

"Beautiful day right?" I looked at him, bewildered. I had just buried my father. Nothing about this ominous day was beautiful.

My shock and disgust were apparent on my features. For what it's worth, Mr. Stevens did look ashamed.

"I'm sorry, I'm really nervous, I wanted to broach a subject to start a conversation with you, and obviously…" He was ranting, and I figured I should put him out of his misery. I couldn't deal with him today. I wanted to strangle him.

"Was there something you needed Mr. Stevens?" I said with my best fake polite tone.

He hesitated for a second, lost for words.

"I wanted to ask how you were doing, and if you wish you could stay with us, my parents told me to ask you, I mean you should be feeling lonely, with your whole family gone I mean?"

He was just being rude. Control yourself Isabella. Control.

"I'm dealing with it. And you seem to be forgetting that I was staying alone even before my parents passed away. And you are aware that we're not acquaintances and I won't be causing your family any hassle."

With that I turned to join Angela and her fiancé. The Webers were the safest people I could be around now because the rest of my parents "friends" were after one thing only. Money.

MM

Happy memories fade. They fade at the back of our heads. We forget them. Not that their not significant or anything. It's just the way it works.

But sad ones, they're counter opposite. They're etched in your memory forever. Not trying to be dramatic here, but that's the truth.

I wanted to remember a time when I was happy. I still couldn't, maybe it was too soon.

After the funeral, everything just turned worse. I had lost hope of finding the rest of my family.

People were hinting more that I shouldn't live alone, and I should be thinking about getting courted.

It was to the point that I spend all of my waking moments at the house. I just stared at the fire place most of the time.

It was February when I realized I couldn't keep this going; it was after I had decided to go out in the city so that I'd stop thinking about my family. But Mr. Stevens and his friends had to ruin my day. My days were ruined already, but they were making everything worse. I needed Jasper to protect me from them. They're behaviors was disrespectful. I returned home with tearful eyes.

A single girl can't live by herself. Maybe a girl can, but "Mr. Cullen's daughter needs someone to care for her." That's what they, all of my dad's friends told me.

However I will prove all of them wrong. I don't need anyone to take care of me. I can do just fine on my own.

MM

"Isabella you have lost your mind, you cannot do this." Angela argued while I was packing my suitcase.

"I _am_ doing this; don't make me regret telling you beforehand." I threatened her, still engaged in packing.

"Where are you going to go, huh? You have no place to go? You are just going to wander off? The world is not a safe place for a lady when she's alone."

"I have a place to go, you don't need to worry about that. And I guess the world is not safe for me even when I'm here as well, I'm alone after all. Wherever I go."

"You have me here."

"Frankly we weren't even close friends until Alice came in the picture." The moment I said it, I regretted it.

"Look Angela I'm not trying to hurt you, but I can't stay here. This place," I gestured toward the walls and ceiling of the house, "is dead, gone, just like them. I can't even breathe here. I'm sorry, but I have to go. I'll come back, Someday. You won't even notice I'm gone; I haven't even talked to you properly since all of this has happened. And you'll be married in a couple of months." I smiled at her; I knew she wasn't convinced, yet.

"Your parents wouldn't have approved of this." She was using all she had; I felt a twinge of guilt.

"They're not here." I whispered.

"You're really going to be okay?"

"Absolutely," although I didn't believe it myself, she seemed to be assured by it.

"Let's get moving then." With that she began helping me pack.

MM

I got away. From familiarity. From home, that wasn't home anymore. From the faces with pity all over them. I walked away from many things, but one. Pain.

The train to New York I want to believe that I handled good. No one bothered me. Much.

There was a nice couple who accepted me in their compartment.

I didn't ask how they met each other; I didn't even ask their names.

"We're newlyweds." The beautiful woman said when her husband excused himself to use the restrooms.

I smiled. A genuine smile after so long. They looked happy and in love.

"I'm Rosalie," extending her hand towards me.

"Isabella," said I, while shaking her hand.

"Nice to meet you Isabella, so might I ask why a woman your age is travelling alone?"

"No." I said tensely.

"I guess I can understand that."

"Do you really?"

"Yeah, a total stranger is asking you a question you obviously don't want to answer, so yes I understand that."

I smiled, again.

"Nice to meet you Rosalie." I said, letting her know that she was accepted.

"You got her to talk, at last?" It was her husband who asked that.

"Isabella, this is my husband, Emmett. Emmett, this is Isabella."

"Beautiful name, for a beautiful lady." He exclaimed.

I looked at Rosalie, who shrugged and said. "He's a charmer."

"Thank you Emmett."

And that was how the trip to New York passed. They told me about how they got married, secretly. Both of their parents had disapproved of their choice of partner so they've escaped and got married. Now they were headed to London. Just like me.

They said we should leave together since it was a long trip. I was more than happy to accept their offer.

"Why London?" I asked them, out of curiosity.

"A friend of mine promised me a good job and a house. We had no other options."

"Must be a good friend."

"He is. Maybe the only person I know who can be trusted. He was visiting Chicago a couple of years ago, that's how we'd met initially. He was doing a business deal, or something along those lines."

"We don't need to know Edward's business deals Emmett, you're boring Isabella." Rosalie interrupted him.

"No it's fine." I said. She rolled her eyes and asked.

"So Isabella, are you from Chicago as well?"

"Umm..yes."

"Anyone we might know?"

"No I don't think so." I felt bad for lying, but I didn't want to be pitied for once in so long.

They both nodded, convinced with my answer.

"It might take a while to make the travel arrangements. I'm assuming you don't have a place to stay?" Emmett asked after a short while of silence.

I shook my head. I haven't even thought of that.

"I just assumed, I'll get to New York, get on a ship and go to London." I said, embarrassed.

"Yeah well I thought that the first time I travelled too." He said, trying to make me feel better.

"I don't want impose." They were newlyweds after all.

"Nonsense. We're staying at a hotel. Emmett can pull some strings to get a room next to ours for you."

I wanted to say no, I wanted to tell them that I could do it on my own. But one glance at the dark windows outside and the fear of unknown won over.

It took Emmett three days to arrange our travel plans. During those three days I tried to recoil, and pull myself away from them. Rosalie wouldn't let me though. She knew something was up with me so she wouldn't leave me by myself most of the time. I snapped at her few times, but she wouldn't budge. "I wanted to be alone that was the whole point of this journey" was what I told her when she wanted me to have lunch with them two days in a row.

My statement was hurtful to anyone else, but to Rosalie this was an encouragement.

"Okay, I'm coming to lunch but I'm paying for myself." I said after they both _tried_ to give me puppy dog eyes.

"Come on Izzie, you're like my little sister, and I won't let my sister pay." As soon as he said it my whole body began to shake.

"I am NOT your sister Emmett." I gritted through my clenched teeth.

They both knew family was a sensitive topic of conversation for me, but they weren't aware of its length.

"I think you should go to lunch without me it's for the best." My behavior was unacceptable but I couldn't pretend that everything was well now.

**OKAYYY, bad place to stop...I know...Edward was originally in this chapter but since i wanted to update sooner you only got his name in this chap...Please review..otherwise the updates will be delayed ( so not threatening)...thank you for reading:)**


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